We Are Finished

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Well, not quite finished. But we have a date set.

The end of life as we know it.

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The time has come for Cam and I to stop nursing.

It is bittersweet, as I love (some of) our special time together, but I am exhausted and overwhelmed.

Cam came out of the womb a nursing champ. He has loved it since day one. He loved it so much that he likes to wake up six, seven, or eight times a night to get his, “nummies.” I can’t sit down without him trying to climb into my lap or pull at my shirt.

For the last two months, I’ve tried mommy-led weaning (oh, this post was a God-send because I was at a loss as to where to begin), and it has helped, but nights are still a bear.

“But, I was done. D.O.N.E. (Imagine me saying “done” with my eyes bugging out of my head, and waving my arms around in circles like a mad scientist with crazy hair who hasn’t slept in years.)
 
… my breastfeeding relationship with my son was starting to take a toll on our mother/child bonding relationship. You see, I was no longer happily breastfeeding, a lot of times I was just plain-ol’ resentfeeding (I just made that word up, but you’ll know it if you’ve done it).”TheJoyofThis.com

 
That quote is where we are.

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So, we have set a date. Falls Creek begins on Monday, July 21. That morning, I will nurse my sweet boy one final time and leave him with my wonderful (I can’t tell you how wonderful) mother-in-law.

It’s bittersweet.

Yes, I know I’ve said that already. It truly is. But it is time. For both of us.

And I’m okay with this. I need to focus on my needs and the needs of my girls. I still have Cam’s best interest at heart, of course, but Cam needs a healthy momma.

It’s quite funny, actually. I weaned Abby Grace at 5 months, and then didn’t produce enough milk for Reese and Meleah. I was bound and determined to breastfeed Cam for at least a year. By the time we stop, we will have breastfed for over 22 months. I had to smile {through a few tears} as I wrote that. God really blessed me through allowing me to successfully breastfeed my son for double the time I had hoped.

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So there you have it. Since I share everything else, I figured I might as well share this. It’s a struggle, y’all. I’ve been back and forth between weepy and excited about the prospect of wearing ALL of my clothes, tossing my nursing bra, and not having to layer. It’s the little things, right?

Your prayers during the next few weeks are appreciated. Thanks for letting me share such intimate details in this space. <3

Comments

  1. says

    Those pics are just precious! I will be praying for you as I know this is a hard transition time. I only nursed my babies for about a year and I often wish I had nursed longer. It was such a wonderful bonding time, but also exhausting. I know it is hard to say goodbye to this phase in life, but you have so many more to look forward to!
    Heather @ My Overflowing Cup´s last blog post ..How I Prep My Kitchen For A Busy Week

    • says

      Ohhhhh you just don’t know what this comment means to me. I truly appreciate your comment and prayers. Thanks for your kindness and encouragement! <3

  2. Miranda says

    Hoping it all goes well! I recently weaned my 15 month old because of first trimester nausea and tiredness. It went really well actually considering how much I dreaded the act of weaning and the fussing and crying that would come with it. Good for you for doing it as long as you did!

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